I WAS PRESIDENT OF THE INTERACT CLUB.

Mmm, Life is so good; especially when you have a backpack full of bananas.  Shall I explain?  At WCU, there is an all-you-can-eat cafeteria.  And, if I'm going to pay $6 for a poorly made meal, I'm going to pack up some bananas for the road.  I'm now the proud owner of 8 bananas, and they are all piled in my bookbag.  Be jealous.

So, life is very lovely at the moment, and although I do have a French test to study for, and I am blogging while eating a banana, and although Volpsers has found by blog, and although I have to be careful not to mention too much about spandex and it's nice effects and what not, life is nice.  I have one of those cold sores in your mouth deals right now, and I have some professional numbing stuff [Mother = Dental Assistant], but it melted in my car and instead of going on the sore, it has gone all over my mouth and I can't feel my tongue.

I made an 85 on my Charleston dance.  Whatever; I know I'm a winner.  Stupid Chris made a 95, while even stupider Volpi made a 100.  So maybe their efforts weren't ignored after all.

So, last night, I was here at WCU in the good ol' CMC until 10 at night.  Chris, Jacklyn and I were working on a floor plan for Susan's class.  Chris being the one with the architects scale, Jacklyn with her company and me with my math savvy know how - I know you're going to say something about how I wasn't that impressive, but just remember who wanted to use 3.92222 ft while I suggested the correct alternative of 3' 11"* - was quite an experience.  So, Chris actually did do more than provide the scale, and, with the three of use, we got the job done.  Without any arguments or outbursts, but there was some playful eraser throwing.  jerk.

*okay, so 3.922 is right, because it's using 10 = 1 instead of 12 = 1, so you were right, but my way is just easier.

And I was so hungry.  So very, very hungry.  Susan also tried to glorify the techies today by saying, "yeah, maybe we should pair of the acting concentrations with the technical concentrations... because this shouldn't be that hard..."

Thus:
Actors = Stupid
Techies = Genius

To which I wanted to say, "did they graduate number 17th in their class?  Did they make 100's in all of their maths, sciences and theatres?  Were they valedictorian of the 5th grade class, with 18 awards, including citizenship!?  WERE THEY PRESIDENT OF THE INTERACT CLUB?*  No, because they were too busy making out under the drafting tables in the vocational building.  I know what I'm doing."  *dramatic hairflip; stalks out of the class room*

Okay, so I may be a little dramatic.  And, I really do, truly respect what the techies do (myself having been one countless, countless times before).  But I do hate it when anyone questions my intelligence based on a stereotype, when I know that I, and my group, are probably the only ones who have done the whole thing right.  I'm not stupid; in fact I'm smarter at anything technical vs. anything in regards to acting.

Besides, did you see their measurements on the board Susan?  I'm more on with my singing.

*and now, a brief and boring story.  Abigail and I were actually co-presidents of the Interact club our senior year.  Did we believe in anything it stood for?  Meh, cooperation, whatever.  Anyhoo, at the homecoming game, Olivia Rusch was crowned queen, and in her little biography, it said that she was PRESIDENT of the Interact Club, and, mind you, she wasn't even a part of it.  I'm not saying she wrote these falsehoods, but whoever did needs to know that WE WERE THE PRESIDENTS.  Ooo, it burns me up to this day.

**I was also president of the the non-existent Drama Club.  We had Drama Promas, until the disco ball fell and almost killed us all.

***I'm the one in the pink top, the tu-tu, the trucker hat and the huge glasses.  It was a weird phase for me.

And this makes me miss the simplicities of high school the most.

I had a plan for this blog, but I don't really know where it's going right now.

I will say the other day I picked up some guy who wanted a ride to the 'Caf.'  I had parked at Ramsey, and I was in my car, texting or something and he came up and ask for a ride.  Now, wait for the description:  He was muscular and topless, with a massive shark tattoo on his back, stomach and side.  Instead of a shirt, he was wearing a sash made from cellophane and a pair of Adidas black and white flip-flops from the 90s.  He was nice as he could be, but I still was kind of frighted, especially after the whole Jeff ordeal and "why do I keep trusting strange men?"  Lucky, he did not try to find any ticklish spots.

I have to meet Abigail for tomfoolery of sorts, so I leave you with a question, and I expect an answer:

Who wears the grey headband better?

-Me

Pee.Ess.
Abigail just comes over and, pointing at my professional numbing stuff, says "Oh, gash, I love that stuff.  Oh, please, may I use some, please, please, please."  I don't say anything because I want her to think it's chapstick, but then I decide against it, and so I say, "um, Abigail, do you know what that is?"  As she sniffs it, she says, "Yes, I know!  I love it.  I love it when my mouth is numb."

...she's currently drooling on my shoulder.  "I can't feel my mouth, Rachel, I can't feel it."

I'm surrounded by idiots.

Robbie is Rap-tastic

You know how Graphic Novels are usually associated with dorks who dress up in leather and go to things like Dragon*Con? Well, I guess Disney is now shooting for that audience because look at their latest addition to the family.

"An All New Graphic Novel." You've went too far HSM. Way too far.
Adding too going to far, look at the new "required" book in the bookstore for a COLLEGE CLASS.

Let me say it again: REQUIRED. What? This is probably the worse example of good literature (writing style), ever, and it's REQUIRED. Not saying it's not a good story, but for College? Bah. But there were other vampire books so I only pray (oh please, oh please) that it's a class on Vampires and not the awesomeness of Twilight.
Now, lets talk about immaturity. This is me. In a shopping cart:

It was very painful and I had a headache afterwards. No one would know it but when clothes are on top of you (and Depends, Hannah Montana calenders, Oprah magazine, diapers, and shoes) it gets rather heavy. But no one realized I was in it the whole time we went around the store... except when I whispered and they looked startled at the basket. Luckily Alex and Brianna kept their cool until AFTER we left.

I sort of regret not jumping out at someone. :(
In other things, Kelly and I went to see Rabun Gap's Cirque. The movements were excellent (this one kid did a push up; sideways; on a pole; a vertical pole) and with all the jumping, standing on rubber balls, hoops, nets and the tiny Asian in a banana suit, I was amazed. But with everything, I am horribly critical, and even though their set was fantastic (or at least the city part; the forest was horrid) and their energy superb, their costumes had that terrible pulled-yet-inconsistent-style to it. Not enough jazz to them.

Whereas there movement was terrific, their acting sort of lacked (sort of, not terrible) at least the two leads were good. Some tall boy in a striped hat and Dylan Duvall played the magician or something. He was definitely the best (which is ironic because the best one learned under the leadership of Oh Mighty Tyrant) and was the only one w/o face make-up. Adding to that, none of those kids knew squat about doing face-makeup. It looked like a three year old had painted on for Halloween.

Afterwards, Kelly and I went back to the senior parking lot and played with her sisters camera: we screamed for it, we laughed for it, we goofed off for it, we got under her running car for it. It was magic. Everett showed up and we attempted to do pictures with me as the third wheel looking mortified at them, but they never turned out well.

We also went to Fatz before and got Everett as our waiter, who brought us Air Heads (blue raspberry) and paid for our meal. But it was all good because we left him a $20 tip.

Saturday was game night and Everett, Kelly and I dominated at Cranium. I lovingly got nominated to do all the acting bits which was great because they guessed them right off. Afterwards we went upstairs and watched The Soup. Or at least Kelly and I did because their was a mass clearing of everyone in the middle of it.
So, yesterday I had my advisor meeting about arranging classes for next semester and I get tons of theatre ones. I have one dance class that runs from 10:10-1:15 and then another movement class that is 2 hours long. So basically, I'm going to be a muscle with and perhaps a little bit more rhythm. Not much; but a little. Along with that I have the possibility of taking a make-up class and a lecture class with Terrence Mann that includes lots of movies. Only thing wrong with this is that my first class would be at 8 in the morning and my Terrence Mann class would end at 7, so essentially, if I go with this plan (hint: I don't think so) I get no sleep. Along with that Susan really wants me to become a design major vs. acting because I apparently have talent in the field. But just wait until she sees my debonair acting. Yeah. I wiggle my eyebrows at that.

Speaking of me and my rhythm and my debonair acting:
Seussical is essentially wearing me out. I scraped my knee yesterday, thus dubbing this play the next Footloose. But, regardless of all the sweat, all the soreness, all the orange juice, all the tiredness and droppyness, I would have it no other way. Everytime I feel my sore thigh I think about how much fun I'm having and I smile and hit it again for more reminecence.
I wish I could say I feel like I'm doing well, but this whole synchrony thing is killing me. Perhaps after an intense dance workout which would include various other things (such as popsickles and nailpolish) I may be able to do those C things with my legs. But, all the same, I can't help feeling like I'm way TOO big compaired to my fellows. For example:

(i.e. I'm the one in the striped shirt) Actually, I don't know what I was doing in this picture. Perhaps I look just slightly better now? Besides my inability to dance, I sing all the songs extreamly low which isn't a bad thing, but I just hope it's on key. Adding to all this, did you know it is next to impossible to get my shoulders to move? I try to shimmy and I end up looking like I'm having a shaking fit all over. I hardly know.
Oh, and I did not obtain a poster, so until I get one, Sevy's windows shall be blank. :( Adding to that, I have window markers in blue and white and guess what is being created on the back of Sev on March 1st? Just guess because, ooooh, it's going to be delicious. I wiggle my eyebrows at this as well.
Everything is just too much fun. :)

And now, I leave you with a gift from the gods. Robbie has created a little rap for us regarding a song from Seuss, and I daresay I was just fortuate enough to have the means to record it at the time. Enjoy because I surely do:



-Me

Activate: Shape of An Ice Menorah

The time has come:

FOR ANOTHER SHOW.

...that looks tacky.  Yes.

You know, you really don't realize how much you miss something until it is taken away from you.  Then you don't realize how much you missed it until you get to start on it again.  And it's when you have been starved for theatrical interaction, not only in stage time, but backstage and socially as well, that you get excited about the small preparations for a show such as your nightly orange juice in your Little Mermaid goblet or buying a sports bra for dancing:

What?  I had to make sure it fit.

Anywho, I don't remember ever being this excited for a show.  I am SUPER pleased with my part (Bird Girl), I am SUPER pleased with my fellow Bird Girls.  On opening night I think I'm going to get gift baskets my BG sisters.  With, you know, sample deodorant and Pixie Sticks or something.  BONDING.

I feel like this is going to be a show to remember.  Not that they all are not unique and amazing in their own special way; this one is just going to have a lot dancing fun attached.  Which I really can't wait for.  Dancing is like, exercising the soul.

Sooo:  COLLEGE.

Ew, I go back Monday.  I still have to clean out Sev:

Because, obviously, he is currently unlivable.  Teej, Abby and I went to Western today to pick up our books.  First we ate at the burrito place on campus and I had the Greek God burrito.  It had the biggest load of rice and beans I have ever seen, but I got some chicken put on it because I have suddenly turned man and I am currently obsessed with meat.  I don't get it, but I'll go with it.  Anywho, I couldn't eat it all because it was freaky huge, and if I can't eat it all... that's saying something.  Got my money's worth though.  Or Abigail's money worth.  I am such a mooch.

So, we got our books, and I have about five, Teej has about five and Abigrail has about... 12.  But this is the horrible thing.  I get to carry these on MWF:

But the best book is my one for my Acting 1 class on Tuesday and Thursday.  Check out the title:

"Respect for Acting."  Oh gah, what have I got myself into.  Don't get me wrong, I do take acting serious (and by serious, I mean for fun.) but I have a feeling this is going to be something like the song "Nothing" from A Chorus Line.  Except I will at least act like I feel something.  Why must everything be so psychological?  Why not just get up there and do it and forget all this mumbo jumbo about being in sync with the ice cream cone?  I dunno...

Oh, and it snowed...

And my cat sat on some pizza boxes:

AND SCRUBS IS BACK!  I missed the first episode of the new season because mom was watching some Hallmark movie about a brick maker (?) and rehearsals were happening at 9.  But luckily, it's on YouTube, and I am about to wet myself with glee.  Ahhh...

Ah, to say "I have rehearsal" has a sweet, sweet, ring to it.  Yes.  And I just got done eating more MEAT.

MEAT. MEAT. MEAT.

ǝɯʇɐǝɯ-

Effie, make this scene SEXY.

Yayyy, I get to babysit Aberdoodle.  She has got her wisdom teeth taken out (needless to say, she is stupider) and I am on patrol for care taking.  Right now she is impersonating Bubba from Forest Gump.  "Fried shrimp, boiled shrimp..."

...?

Needless to say she is extremely precious.  She keeps wanting hugs and I am flattered.  I guess the true you shows when you're in the dork zone.  She can't find her mouth either while she's eating.  She drinks her water by sticking out her tongue and searching for it then successfully slurping.  Talking to her stuffed Mickey.  And she is flashing her undershirt to me as well.

"My lip it feels like, *piiith*" she says.

How does she feel?

"I feel like someone sat down on a giant throne and crapped me oiut.  I can’t feel anything though thank god."

She typed that for me to express her feeling.  But all in all, she looks lovely, sort of like a wounded dear.  "Polly wanta crackkkerr... squackkk.  Oh soup, how I loove you, how I love your smiling face... *whispers* I'm serenading my soup.", 

Essentially, I am having a very schadenfreude day.  Is that bad?  Probably.  But she is sooo loving, and I just like petting her.  I know, I know, it's weird, but God bless her, she is cute.

IN OTHER NEWS:

I gots an email from my new acting director.  To dress confotably and "part of my philosophy of teaching Acting is that you cannot successfully separate body from mind and emotions.  We will be doing quite a bit of group exercises (Theatre exercises, not jumping jacks), some Theatre Games, etc., and we’ll probably leap right in to the fray on Day #1."

AHHH, THEATRE EXERCISES.  MAHHH.  Lots of rubber baby bumpers or whatever.  YAY, I GETS TO LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT.  YAY.  No, I am pretty excited, even though I won't say I like improv.  But I amount that some bonding will take place, and I suppose it's all good in the hood.

Perhaps I'll share some of them and we can do them together.  Hee hee.

-Me

Strawberry Smoothie Pleassee *wink*

Happy Christmas.  :)  It is tomarrow, yes, but whatever I am going to go ahead and say it.  Have a good one.  Unless you're Scotty.

...Imajerk.

Speaking of Uncle Scotty, WHITE HOT CHOCOLATE = Delicious.  Slurp.  I knew it was made with love.  Except mine, which was made with arsenic.  It was a very fun little shindig, with lots of salad (Zesty I-talian of magic) and pizza with, canadian bacon?  And Jazzy I am still sorry for stepping on your paw.  My mom nearly killed me for that.

Kelly and I met before and went to Kmart.  Kelly got a plastic elephant for Christmas.  It was amazing.  We also (almost) bought Scotty and Nikki this really ugly thing with a picture of the city in the background and it had water that jumped to music and it lit up green, blue and red.  And it was framed with fake wood.  It was very tacky... guess it reminded us of them.  Mahhh.

Hm, someone is being grinchly today.  Bah humbug.

Adding to that I hate "A Christmas Carol."  Abigail used to force me to watch it when we were little.  All them stupid RATS POPPING OUT WINDOWS.  And no name calling Abigail.  I daresay I am not near as promiscuse as you.  Mahhh.

And with that I went to the Gazibo and ordered a Strawberry Banana Smoothie in a seductive voice.  I think the waiter was... concerned.

On another note, we fed cats today.  They were having a drive at Dollar Tree to buy cat food and donate it to the cat man.  I have no idea, but it was felinetastic.

Break.  Is.  So.  Good.

So, I still have like two weeks left of vacation.  I am on book four of Harry Potter... I would say, hey I am going to get through by the end, but I'm a little uncertain because book four and onward are tombs.  800 pages of magic.  Will I?  Won't I?  I know not.

I also got the whole set of Anne of Green Gables for Christmas from Aberdoodle.  I can't wait to read them.  And Pride and Prejudice... and Invisible Monsters... Sooo many books.

"I didn't know you could read."
I know Draco.  What is up my crawl?

In other news:
Sweetlanta, no.

Mugglespace

Okay.  This is a little something I call grasping for straws.  As much as it cuts my soul, Harry is over.  If Wanner Brothers created something like this, I would think hey this is amazing, but seriously... just stop.  Leave it to the officials.  It's just a grouping of nerds who think they love Harry Potter, but seriously, they have no idea what love is.  Fools.

-HappyChristmasMe

Hello my name is stress, but you can call me College.

Hayyy everyone. And when I say everyone, I mean the three or less people who read my blog. Right now I am sitting in the UC drinking a Javalance (my recent addiction...and only 1.5 grams of fat) for lunch because Abigail and I are going out with Uncle Scotty and Aunt Nikki before this big Republican thingine at Western. Vote Susan Pons! Or else...

Wait, what kind of threat could I possibly place? I'll cat-rub you out of existence?

Mahh... anyway, COLLEGE. I think I am going to tell you about it the same way Abigail did on her blog (hey, that was the first time I ever actually read one through!). Numbers make everything better...

1. Parking is awful. Unless you get there ubber early and get to park behind the library. Parking at the field house is torture, and it literally takes 30 minutes to get to the center part of the school. CatTrans (or, once all the lazy fat people wait for them to travel to their next class that's approx. 10 meters away, FatTrans) can pick you up, but it's often not worth the hassle of waiting.

2. College isn't as frighting as it seems. Even though Abigail may act cool in her blog, the first day she was freaking out. I was just bored. And for the record Abigail, freaking out about forgetting your schedule and a pair of socks doesn't count for being freaked about about college.

3. Math is easy, I already know it all. Theatre is easy, I've known it all since the 6th grade. Now, I could humble myself and say, "Thank you Scotty. Because of you, I'm smarter than everyone else AND I actually know how to act." But I'm not that kind of person and instead I'm going to say, "You're a jerk." *note: As much as I hate admitting it, that first comment is true. There, I said it. I appreciate it all. Now, as much as I adore admitting it, the second comment is also true.

4. OMGob... you will never guess who I have classes with (okay, so most of you know but I went to a lot of trouble making this clip, so deal with it)

The OTHER Calliope. From Smokey's Cinderella! Now, of course I dropped the bomb that I was in Cinderella myself. But she saw it! And she said our transformation scene was better. Sadly, I had no complements in return (even though I almost said, "I like the little lights your tech crew wore around their necks...) but I did send her a link to my blog...

Okay, not really. Also, speaking of Calliope, I was eating in the bagel place today, and I saw Manerva across the room.

Oh the bliss of freaky coincidences.

5. So, the theatre department... more or less the kids in the theatre department. I know none of there names, so I usually have inner nicknames for them all. There is this tall, gay, black kid then there is the fat annoying girl who always shows her...chest. Then there is the girl that's like "I played Cinderella in Into the Woods and I'm best friends with everyone in the theatre department, ANNDD I LOOVE THEATTRE MMMORRRE THHHANN YOUUU!!" As if, freak-o. But the funny thing about it is, even if you did play Cinderella in Into the Woods that really doesn't tell me much about how good you are. For instance, she tried out for Othello and claimed she got called back for Desdemona. But yet she is Messenger #2. But where the actually hilarity flies, is when we all try to compare our high school programs...

FatAnnoyingChestyGirl (Did I mention she never shuts up? "I'm a theatre major, I'm a theatre major, I'm a theatre maj... Pleassse...): So, at my high school my drama teacher was CRazzy. We did a Midsummer's Night Dream. (*cough* Scotavious Rule #1: Shakespeare and high school is a no-no.) And a Holocaust play. (Say what?)

ILOOVETHEATTREGirl: Well, we did Les Mis and I played Cosette (just had to add that in there, didn't you?) and I had this costume made out of upholstery fabric that was five times to big for me...

Me: *casualscoff* We made our own costumes...

Bragging rights are beautiful. But out of all the pesky OMGTHEATRE kids, there is a few I like. Namely, the tall, black, gay kid. I knew we were destined to be friends when he asked me the valued question of "Are you on crack?" (Today he said "I wish you were on crack, because that would be AWsome!") He's been a sweetie ever since, complementing me on my hussy eyeshadow and wanting me to try out for Plaza Suite. He must of recognized my true potential, unlike someone else I know who gave me the part of Munchkin #2. *cough*Scotty*cough*

Okay, so I never actually acted out in that class, so it was really all my fault. Here's a note for all you people who don't think Scotty sees your true potential: the reason he doesn't see it is because you're not showing it. Blame yourself for once.

What's my problem...I'm defending Scotty. Someone must have put something in that Javalance... Probably crack... :)

Anywhooo, I didn't try out for lack of resume and headshot issues, but I was proud my tall, gay, black friend for obtaining the part of Othello in Othello.

6. All in all, I'm glad I'm commuting. No, I don't get to participate in things like the Honours College Cookout (WHAT AM I MISSING!?), but, as it is, I miss my mom way to much. And I see her everyday. Not only would I miss my mom, but I would miss all my old friends. And when I say old, I mean actually old. Like, Effie is 60....wait, no she's 59. Good job getting her age wrong, doofus. Speaking of last night, when I went out of the retirement homes parking lot (see what I mean, about OLD friends?) I took the wrong road. I eventually turned around in someones grass, but I was scared at the time...

7. College is a time for self-discovery...

Wait, who write stuff like that? That's garbage. And by the way Abigail, you hang out with me because you're a loser and I'm your only window for looking cool. And I stole your number 7 reason off your blog... the whole "College is about self-discovery..." I felt like looking like an idiot.

And how dare you mention my mud bathing, for it wasn't that at all. It was a war between me and the 11 year old cousin whose arm I broke. Big difference.

-me.

OMG I'M ALIVE!

Not that you would technically know by my posting status... it's not like I have the Internet or anything...


OASJFL;JWERIOWJE WAIT! I got a new laptop for college. Huzzah! I have named her Beatrice, and she's a gorgeous yellow. I caress her often, and complement her Wi-Fi and DVD burning abilities. What can I say? I'm a technological junkie that types 250 words a minute. Don't be jealous.


So, since its been a very, very, VERY long time since I have posted something about my so-called life, I guess a massive update is in order:


Joined the German Mafia.




Adopted a killer whale.



Got a hard core tattoo.




Got ran over.


And found and declared my own island.

Now to the unimportant things:

So, on Monday:










Ahhhh! I have my schedule, I did my Alcohol test (don't mix animal prescriptions and alcohol together.), I have my $66 book on health, and I have a book bag to store my beloved Beatrice in. I've hunted all my classes down, cleaned Sevy out...

Sort of excited, sort of scared, more apathetic than anything.

Speaking of Sevy:
He was mummified.

Thanks guys, thanks.

And he was glittered. I still have some left in my gas cap




If Uncle Scotty's butt was as big as his ego, this is half the amount of toilet paper he would use. Wait...


IT IS.


Gah, I'm a jerk. Told you I could get real hardcore with a keyboard.


Other Newsith!

Went and saw Avenue Q with Effie. It twas AWESOME! A little racy (okay, super racy), fantastic set, great fun. The guy who played Princeton was WUNDURFUL!11! And good looking. (Yes I like boys.) They even had ROCKKET BEDDS!! Vertical Rocket Beds. Just like Charlie Brown's. So cool. A little graphic, but SOO cool! I felt like I was at a kids show...for adults.

Speaking of Broadway, in our Playbill they mentioned something about Shrek the Musical.
Concerned? I am.

awwoeirw!


Sooo, once I am going to College, I should post some things about my wonderful college life (I have a Chick-fil-a. Glower.) Speaking of posting:


Message for Aberdoodle:
You're blog is boring.
-Love, Me.


Nhowww:
I went and saw Mamma Mia at the Mall of Georgia with an esteemed group of idiots. And got a fantastic pair of bright blue skinny jeans...


I have seen the Broadway play mind you. What I thought of it? Well...


Other than Pierce Broslin looking in pain every time he sung?

It was cheesy. Lots and lots of cheese. And then there was Meryl Streep groping herself. Sofie has a nice voice, but second time around it was VERRY vibrato, and it was kind of annoying. I'll buy it on dVd, none the less. No one could really sing, that well, and you could tell that all of the casting was done on nothing but acting talent. It paid no homage to the fabulous play, and didn't have enough songs. Either that or they weren't sung well enough to fill my wants and needs.

Lets put it this way: I liked it as badly done as it was, if I had to choose between Mamma Mia and Bourne Supremacy, I definitely choose Mamma Mia. It wasn't fant-ABBA-licious (that's bad isn't it. Well guess what, the whole movie is more cheesy than fant-ABBA-licious will ever be.), but it's a great movie when it's four in the morning and you're drunk off CapriSuns at a sleepover.


I'll try to keep in contact on my blog, when I'm not studying. For now, I say good bye and leave you with a picture of me strangling my cat.


-Me

Updatles

Why do I always use numbers?

1. So, today I am at the library. After a pack of free twizzlers; Abigail had some odd bout with the vending machine, which she is now eating in the no eating zone while commentating on the weirdos in the library, questioning why I come here in the first place. She's the weirdo for following me here in the first place. Stalker.

Am not! she says. Well, I may not know much but cat rubbing isn't usually part of a normal cousin-to-cousin relationship.

Then again, normalcy isn't quite a word that describes our relationship (You know, sort of like Scotty and Sam. I know what I saw.)

2. So I locked myself out my car the yesterday. I went to the hair dressers, and I started looking for my keys. Couldn't find them, so I went out to the car and they were in the ignition. Luckily I had barely cracked the passenger side mirror and a few gentleman were more than welcome to come to my assistance. After sticking crowbars and metal rods in my window, they ran into the mexican place and borrowed a metal hanger. It was then that my door was unlocked. I went to take my keys out of the ignition, and it was still running. What is generally bad about it all is I could have just rolled down the automatic window with the hanger and unlocked it that way. Sometimes my stupidity gets the best of me.

3. So I have this new mouthwash. It's called Smart Rinse by Listerine. It's so amazing because when I spit it out, it tints all the food and bacteria so I can see that it's working. I have 'Berry Shield' flavour, and it is so ubberly delicious that I just want to drink it.

4. Abigail is really acting like a freak. She keeps feeding me twizzlers and winking at me. I am not sure if I should be creeped out or...creeped out. The twizzler just fell out my mouth. I think it is because my mouth always seems to be agape.

5. I had my first tomato this year yesterday. When I ate it, I think I went to heaven and back. I could almost write an ode to tomatoes I love them soooo much. Yum... yum... yum.

6. Guess what? I am going to be in the talent show this year. Not for any real talent of course; Taylor is controlling all of me. We are doing "They Both Reached For The Gun" from Chicago, and I am going to be a puppet. I hope it will be good, but when it comes to moving my body, it just usually doesn't end well.

7. I get to register to VOTE! I have been waiting for this moment all my life. Who cares about getting to smoke and buying dirty videos at 18? I GETS TO VOOOTES! The greatest thing though, is that on the registration form it has a place to draw a map of where you live if you don't have a street address. So basically, if you are a hobo, you can vote. Stellar, eh?

8. I saw some old pictures of my future husband in leather pants today. And my goodness, he is a looker!

-Me.

It's MEEEE!

Garhh...



Hey Rachel! Do you think you should actually post a blog for once in a bigillion years?


Certainly Rachel! I suppose I could.

...



1. Right now I am doing college stoof. Blarh. It's almost so ridiculously overwhelming it's pathetic. What classes to take...which ones to not?

What makes me the most angry is the fact that they didn't send me any audition information concerning the theatre department. Nothing. I put that I wanted to be a theatre major. They did nothing. The lady I emailed didn't even email me back. So I think, "hey, why don't I just see when the theatre auditions are?"

They are long past.

It *&?#$ me off. So now I have to wait forever (as in next year) to audition to go to stupid theatre school. How stoopids.

Then they made me take this dumb personality mosaic, and I got three different types of personalities. The hilarious thing is that they all contradicted each other. I got one that said I wanted to be a leader, then one that said I wanted to be a follower, then one that said I liked structure, the other one said I hated it. I bite my thumb at YOU personality mosaic.


2. Cast Par-tay tonight. I love cast parties, even if they have 180 people and are more of a family reunion. Besides there is going to be Paper Plate awards. :) How much fun. And I'm bringing COOOOKIES.


3. You know it's ubber pathetic because every time a play is over I can't help but be super excited that another one is coming up. Please Rachel, get a life. But I daresay, this play has been a lot of fun. It's such a classic play. I became closer with a few people (Abigail, Amanda and some pre-schooler named Taylor) got some very precious cards, and Jennifer beat me up like none other. I would say something about her, and next thing I know this claw comes out of no where, clamps around my arm and she drags me under the shoe and clothing pile in the dressing room and essentially destroys me. Then the rest of the horses stampede in, get naked, and then try to rub their bodies on me. Thank God I got out of there in time because heaven knows I would have got in the fetal position and cried.

Rachel is done.

-Me

Remember Children...

DO NOT DO DRUGS.

This week I had a little brush with chemicals to the brain.... basically I got high. Of course it wasn't deliberate (okay, so I'm afraid to say 'fart' around my mom [and I feel awful typing it now] so do you really think I would take up sniffing markers for a past time? I'm not too bright sometimes, but you have to give me some credit.) for I was working on a school project.

I was colouring this thing for my art class final and all I had to colour it with was a 24 boxed set of permanent markers. Well, it was a big picture to colour, but I sat down and started colouring all the same. After a while, my vision is getting a little blurred, and I look at mom and say "I'm feeling a little woozy." Of course she starts to hit the panic button and tells me to put the markers up. So I'm feeling pretty good, then all of a sudden this random bout of depression hits me. I curl up in the floor in the fetal position and start thinking of all the mean things people have done to me (I am talking about the times when people tell me they wish I would commit suicide and the times they tell me I'm ugly... not the usual aggravating Rachel moments.), and how no one likes me, and how I stink at everything I try, and nothing would make me feel better. I was actually contemplating suicide in the washing machine (but I realized I was too much of a pansy to ever do it.) when my mom asked me why I was all quiet and recluse. So I tell her everything, and she tells me that the people who count love me and sends me off to bed.

That night I have the most vivid dream that was almost like a movie (it included witnessing to serial killers, bunk beds, Barbie Dolls, the witches of Oz and farm equipment.) and I slept for about 15 hours. Next morning I feel fine. Even I was wondering why I was so depressed.

Then, I concluded: IT WAS THE MARKERS....! I had my own bout with drugs and it was a complete accident. Don't worry friends, there is absolutely no addiction to them, but all the same, it was a bit of a scare. Mom was petrified at the time, but we now find it as laughable as the time I branded myself with a hairdryer or the time I stuck a bead up my nose. It is just another chapter in the absolutely ridiculous and long list of stupid things I have done.

A little note though: Don't be afraid to offend me. I honestly don't take it bad; I am actually my most favourite person to make fun of. I don't have low self-esteem unless I sniff markers, and I don't plan on doing it ever again. So don't hesitate on brutally attacking me. Trust me, I know you only do it out of affection.

-Me



Note to Abigail: Diss my onion/italian dressing breath all you want. At least my breath doesn't smell like whatever Josh ate last.


Told you I would serve you a heaping pound of pay-backage. What now, WHAT NOW?

Pee.Ess.
While perusing through some of Abigail's computer files, I found out what kind of pictures she bothers saving.



And this is just one of them. There are tons of fuzzy animal pictures saved on her computer from birds to squirrels, and most of them have cutesy file names such as "Bambi and Thumper." You disgust and shame me Abigrail. You're. A. Freak.

Life Cereal.

I feel like using numbers...

1. For some odd reason, I feel fairly pressured right now. I have to do some sketches in art, and on top of all my other work it's like...oof. That's a kicked in the stomach oof by the way.

2. Canned yams are amazing. With cinnamon... Oh. My. Gollystocketenburger.

3. Pre Cal is getting easier. It helps when you listen and stop drawing pictures of dead squirrels for Abigail. I feel bad, but I'm rather ADD this year, so I'll try to overlook it.

4. I am slightly scared to see 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show.' I'm not going to lie. All the...scantly dressed individuals doing gosh knows what...uh. Mom is still a tad bit apprehensive about me seeing it, something about "Jesus would be displeased."
I daresay, he probably would be. If I was Jesus, I would be displeased.

5. Do you ever have bad habits that you can't seem to get rid off? Mine is talking bad about people behind their backs. Not people I like, but people I can't stand. I always say, "I'm going to fix this problem." But then I do it and I never think twice, then at night I'm like, "Well..."

6. Why do people change when they get to college? And not for the better, I might add. It's like every heathen impulse just breaks through like a rampaging hippo, and next thing you know, it's F this and F that, and lets booze it up, and heaven knows what else.

7. Speaking of college, I applied to Western today. Major? Well...
...
....
Ah, it's not that important.

8. HALLOWEEN! Oooo. Not as good as Christmas, but kind of next in line. I'm going as Elphaba from 'Wicked' and Abigail is going as Galinda from 'Wicked.' 'Wicked' I say, not the 'Wizard of Oz.' That one is so overplayed.

9. Abigail's a grouch today. "Don't aggravate me." Like she never does to me. Gosh, pull that burr out of your hinny, Abby. And that whole "Previous obligations" spill...sheesh. Even though your tales about your gay piano teacher to rivet me so. Srsly. Omg.

10. I think I ate too much cinnamon. 'Cause I don't feel to swell right now.

11. I wish Andy Griffith came on later so I watch it instead of Mother watching the stupid football game. Garh.

12. So, the whole 'Dumbledore is Gay' thing has had a moment to settle in my brain, and I have came to this conclusion about the whole thing, countless others agreeing:
a. She did it for publicity, and he was never gay throughout the books.
b. Once love was so important to Dumbledore, and, essentially, the theme throughout the whole book series is love prevails all, you think he would be like, 'Oh, yeah and Harry, I was in love with Grindelwald. Just, um, so you know. Did you get the memo? I'm gay. Yeah."
c. Out of the hundreds and hundreds of Harry potter pages, you think he would say this about himself at least once.
d. It's a kid book. No one even expected it. Out of all the messed up and demented relationships people have come up with, I don't think one included Dumbles being gay.

...

I'm done.

...me.

Liberalism is a Mental Disorder.

Zaaah...

Hee..hee.

Abigrail and I were driving down the road and we saw this kid. He was standing on the side of the road, and he must have been about 7 or something. Well, he a big, long, arched stick that he was holding on top of his head and he was licking his lips and staring at us. It was basically... hillarious. Abigail stopped in the road and started laughing and snorting and making noises that are usually only issued when Josh is vacumming her face off, but... whatever. I swear the kid probably had applesauce and stewed tomatoes for brains.

Remember children, don't do drugs.

So, yesterday, these popular (and not very crispy white in nature if you catch my drift) girls wanted our lunch table outside, and they got it Friday, but I definantly marked my terf by pouring water in the hole on the table. (Yeah, I was like "Hai, I need to pour me some water on this hole. Dun know why, just do." And they looked at me like I had told them Hillary was a good choice for president. Basically, like I twas a freak.) So, they come and sit by me with all their cronies, and all my friends were like... whatever.

So, this saw this Wiccan girl and they were like "omg hai, read my fortune." So she told them all this crap, and I'm thinking God knows the future not ye palm...fools.

Dorks.

Signing off..

Me.

Money makes the world go around, the world go around, the world go around...

Alas... internet fads.

I dunno. But it seems everybody is migrating to something else (i.e. myspace to facebook.) and internet fads come... and go. People get offended because you didn't friend them, or you called them stupid or ignored them or something, and it's just stupid.

I went from 115 friends to 102, and keeping up with that many is stupid. Only old people and artists use blogger, and I thought... why not?

Xanga isn't nothing but corupt ville, and out of my 102 friends about 8 read my blog on MySpace... so... whutevva. Plus, I can talk about all the people I hate and NO ONE HAS TO KNOW... muhahahhahaah... *evil laugh*

...no. Seriously.

Sewww... on to the exciting things at school!

Senior this year. Slack classes? Not so much.

1. Pre Cal - is mkay... I am quite good at math, (100 average all last year. yah.) but on our review is kind of boring... I just got out of math, lets get on to the good stooof. Like Pre-Cal. Yes, I realize that nearly everyone else needs review, but I got it the last fifty time Mrs. Leonard taught it to me.

2. Theatre IV - It's drama... 'nuff said. Okay... all I've got to say is I'm super glad that one short girl who sang nasily and DRIVES ME TO THE POINT OF CARVING ORNATE BED POSTS OUT OF MY LEGS isn't there because she annoyed me. "lyk omg guyz... bffl." *note: She writes just like that, and you sit there wondering where correct grammar went. All these 'lol' and 'wtf' and whatevers... It's not impressive. Just. Stop. Please. Oh, and Drama is absolutly missing some sort of link without Nick, Jarrod and Anna. No one to push me around, feed me salt, play candles with, totally basterdize my beliefs, cheat with me on cards, etc. Perhaps I'll have to be all the drama II and I's master. Hm... 'Master Rachel' certainly has a ring to it. 'Firstie get me a drink.'

Actually it's sort of to the point to pathetic because they do it. Of course I did it too, but... oh, never mind. There was a method to my ignorance. *sigh*

3. English 12 Honours: I really like Mrs. Eldridge. I've never been much of an English fan, but I pretty much love her class. Just the fact that she gets all up in what she teaches is awsome. Monotone is definantly not a word to describe her.

4. Art II: I've never took an art class before, but I like it so far. I drew a colooge of ears, noses, lips, and ears. And it looks like vibrant barf. Yay.

...I don't want to graduate, but... I suppose I'll have too. Harry dropped out, so why can't I? (Just kidding... I definantly don't want to drop out. I'm 19 in the class, I have come so far. And my mother would beat my rearend in if I even suggested it.) Of course he had to go bust a cap in Voldie, and I don't. Uhoh, HPADD just kicked in...

THE SERIES IS OVER. *tear* Actually, I'm not as upset as I thought I would be. I'm glad to know what happened. Harry didn't die, and, on top of it all, he had GINNY's baby. Garh. I hate you Harry. You were supposed to marry me. ME DURN IT.

I'll keel you.

...oh and I think I have strep, but whatever. Dranage is "naaast-e." <--[how Abigrail pronouces it.]

I hope I'm not dying. Preacher Wooten says we are all dying, and it's true, we are. But I mean quicker than my time. I want to vote. A lot. Upcomming election. Pretty darn excited. Who I want to get it thus far? I'm between Gulliani and Huckabee. I'll be for anyone as long as Hillary doesn't win. I'd rather lick mustard off roadkill than vote for a democrat. Unless they were secretly republican. Then I'd be game.

-Mah.

Pee.Ess.
I'm glad Abismell isn't anal today. She was yesterday. DON'T ARGUE WITH ME ABIGAIL BECAUSE YOU WON'T WIN. YOU WERE GRUMPY AND IT WASN'T YOUR MOTHER IT WAS ALL YOU.

Yesss... Abigail has a grumpy side believe it or not. And I am usually the cause of it.